Nothing good ever happens in Hungary

Sheep in Hungary are complaining that, "Nothing good ever happens here."

In the past few months they've had to cope with worsening economic conditions that prompted several acts of public violence, horrific flooding that carried toxic chemicals and -- most recently -- a stampede at a night club where several young people were killed.

"It was horrible," said Istvan, a sometimes-tour guide and sometimes-auxiliary policeman. "People trampled in the rush to escape the chaos ."

When asked what he thinks started the rampage he shook his head sadly and said, "Sheep."

Lonely Hungarian Sheep have been known to frequent local night clubs in search of love and companionship.

"Many of the victims have hoof prints," the policeman informed us. "And clenched in their fists are tufts of wool. Obviously, they put up a fight."

A memorial will be held on Wednesday to mourn the loss of the young people. Afterwards there will be a dinner of mutton chops and lamb pie held at Budapest's Sailor Inn.